ロンドン南部にお住まいのサイモン・フーパーさんは、長女・次女・そして末っ子の双子ちゃんという4人娘の育児に日々奮闘しているパパ。

サイモンさんのインスタグラムアカウント「Father Of Daughters(娘たちの父)」は2017年1月にも Pouch でご紹介しておりますが、あれから1年半以上が経過してもなお、相変わらずてんやわんやの毎日を過ごしているみたいなんです。

育児の大変さがより伝わってくるのが、8月1日に投稿された “隠し撮り動画”

サイモンさん、そして双子のオティリーちゃんとデリラちゃんが眠るベッド、その真上に設置されたカメラが見たものは……早朝5時55分には目を覚まし、それから約30分ほどかけてパパを起こそうとアレコレいたずらしまくる、わんぱくすぎる双子ちゃんの姿でした。

【ママがいないワンオペの朝】

双子ちゃんのママ、つまり奥様のクレミーさんは助産婦さんとしても働いているため、この日は朝4時30分には家を出ていたといいます。そのため何が起ころうともサイモンさん1人で対応しなければならない運命にあるわけで、共働きの宿命とはいえこりゃ大変だ~!

【起きたい双子ちゃん vs どうしても寝たいパパ】

目を覚ましてモソモソ動き始めた双子ちゃんを制するべく、「じっとしててくれないかな?」とつぶやくサイモンさん。

しかしすっかり目が覚めてしまった双子ちゃんは全く聞く耳持たず、2人遊びをしたり(これはまだいい)、パパの顔を何度もひっぱたいたり(これはツライ)、お布団をトンネル代わりにして遊んだり(楽しそう!)と、好き放題。

【お腹がすいてシリアルをおねだり】

動き回っているうちにお腹がすいたのか、6時を10分ばかり過ぎたころには「シリアルターイム!」と叫びながらパパの背中の上で飛びはねたり、布団を引っぺがしたりと、次々にチカラワザを繰り出してくるんです。

【30分の格闘の末…】

ここまでされたら根負けしてしまいそうですが、サイモンさんの中では眠気が勝っているのか、なんとかもう少し寝ようとふんばります。

そんなサイモンさんをどうにか起こそうと、今度は2人がかりで背中に乗っかる双子ちゃん。そのうち1人は頭に乗っかっていて、たまらず「おりてーー!!」と声が出ちゃう始末……。

そうこうしているうちに時は流れて、6時22分。サイモンさんは「ママどこにいるの?」と双子ちゃんに聞くも、「あかちゃんをおむかえしてるよ!」との答え。「せやな……」としか言えないサイモンさんでありました。

1分後、観念したサイモンさんの「よし、じゃあ起きよっか」というひと言を合図に、やっとサイモンファミリーの1日が本格的に始動☆

【おむつも替えてほしかったみたいです】

ちなみに……起床する際にサイモンさんが双子ちゃんに「おむつ替えてほしい子いるかなー?」と聞いたら、2人とも「わたし!」と答えていたので、おむつが濡れてしまったことも早起きの原因だったのかも?

とにもかくにも、朝早くからお疲れ様でした~! 次は朝食の準備ですね、引き続き頑張ってください!

参照元:Instagram @father_of_daughters
執筆=田端あんじ (c)Pouch

▼パパがんば!

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Ever wondered what it's like to try & secure a lie-in while small versions of yourself terrorise you from the moment the sun rises? Well wonder no more……. There are 2 things my brain struggles to accept as both an adult & a parent 1). That the universe is infinite & 2). that lie-ins are a thing of the past. As the sun creeps into my room, I start my daily battle with nature & pointlessly fight the spinning of this lump of rock we live on in the hope of gaining just a few more moments of internal eyelid inspection. It's only then, as I hear small voices in surround sound asking for cereal & discover the shit fairy has kindly UPS'd me an overnight delivery of brimming nappies, that I remember on Monday's @mother_of_daughters goes to work at 4.30am to catch babies & I that I now have twins who can get out of their cots, so my chances of a lie in are slimmer than a piece of A4 paper on a crash diet – Didn't stop me trying for 28 minutes though. Bye bye lie-ins. I'll see you in about 20 years time by which time I'll be old & won't be able to lie in anyway. #twins #lieinfail #twinlife #whatsaliein #parenting #dadscomm #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #fod

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▼双子ちゃん、お人形さんみたいにかわいいです

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There's an unwritten but globally understood rule that the shattered parent that gets up with the kids to give other equally shattered parent a lie-in is responsible 4 key things: 1). ensuring that said kids remain quiet as a church mouse who's biten off his own tongue so as not to disturb the sleep deprived bear like creature in mummy & daddy's bedroom, 2). The house should not resemble the aftermath of a ram raid on a toy store, 3). The dinner from the night before can not and will not be still on the side sticking the kitchen out & 4). All children should be fed and watered before the other parent finally rises from their 100ply cotton covered hibernation. Now look at these 2, read their faces & tell me how many of these I managed today before @mother_of_daughters came down stairs. I'll give you a clue – it was just the right number to get told off. My fault really – playing always comes top of my list of chores. Linen PJs are from the lovely @meloandmarl who we met on holiday this summer. #dadsabadinfluence #iblamethetwins #doubletrouble #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #fod #twins

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No one's happy about bedtime at the moment, especially the twins. The routine used to be so simple – Change, feed, whack on the musical mobile, kiss & leave the room so quietly, you could hear a baby mouse fart – Done. Over the last 2 years however, We've buckled to the demands of the mini dictators with whom we share genetic code in order to buy silence which has resulted a routine that is quite frankly ridiculous. The whole process takes around 90 mins if we're lucky – bath, teeth, wrestle nappies on, choose PJs, remove PJs as they don't have bunnies on, find a twin that's run off & hidden behind clemmie's clothes, put nappies on again, give them milk, ensure they have more soft toys than an assassin who went to a fair ground, cleaned up on the duck hunt & promptly won all the cuddly bears, read a book, deal with a tantrum, argue over who had the dummy last, put them in one cot together to read, separate them after extensive hair pulling, kiss, hug, kiss again as one twin didn't feel they got enough first time around, leave, come back in to return to their cots they've escape from, then repeat the whole process again until they're shattered. Then it's on to the eldest 2! No wonder our adult time has dwindled to 45 minutes in the evening….. #theroutineisbroken #wecanonlyblameourselves #twins #wegaveintoomuch #bedtime #gotosleep #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #fod

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This is what happens when you leave your sister in charge of bathing the twins, who then promptly take complete advantage of the situation and decide to make the contents of the room, including my sister, wetter than a soppy haddock watching back to back rom-coms while in a bath of evian. Mind you, I still think it might be drier than @thebigfeastival where we're heading tomorrow with the Fam (weather is supposed to be better – fingers crossed). Do come along and say at if you're there as @mother_of_daughters and I will knocking about & be doing book signings sat next to each other while my parents wrestle the girls and stop them from consuming all the sugar in the known universe ( it's obviously not a competition, but if my line could be longer than clemmie's, it would be much appreciated!) See you there! #wetroom #soppyhaddock #youhadonejob #comeandsayhi #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #fod

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▼お姉ちゃん2人とママも元気そう~

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Forget ultra marathons, this summer has been 2 month long endurance parenting test that's pushed us beyond what we'd previously thought humanly possible. It's tested our ability to balance childcare with work & to not forget where the girls are at any one time, our patience with bored kids (despite being offered every activity known to man) & our skills in pulling together meals that aren't scoffed at my our in-house restaurant critics. @mother_of_daughters & I have be played off eachother, been eaten out of house & home on a daily basis, argued until the blood vessels ruptured in our eyes & confiscated screens over a million times while aging about 20 yrs in the process, but we've also laughed a lot, made some memories & emerged at other end of the summer holidays tunnel smiling & without having killed each other, so we must have done something right. Only another 16 more years of this to go before they all leave the nest & I start crying permanently for the rest of my life because I want them back. #thesummerparentingtest #endofthesummertunnel #nomurderhere #thankgodforschool #summersoverletsmoveon #enduranceparenting #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #fod #instadad

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▼夫婦仲は以前と変わらずラブラブなようです♡

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Somehow, we blinked and 10 years of marriage with this one has vanished over the horizon in the rear view mirror, yet she still has the ability to take my breath away, give me the kind of heart palpitations that would worry a GP and generally make me feel like & act a 15 year old man child who knows he's punching above his weight. Thanks for putting up with me, for having all the babies & for agreeing to share your life with me @mother_of_daughters , I promise to keep things interesting and to make our lives together the best they can be . Here's to the next 10 – let's just try to procreate less this coming decade. #shesakeeper #isthatahalo #mywife #partnerincrime #10yearanniversary #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad

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